Friday Fodder

I scoured the internet for funny Friday Fodder. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: The materials and information you find on "FRIDAY FODDER"
do not [always] represent the expressed opinion of the author.
In addition, the materials found on Friday Fodder are
oftentimes mass distributed, thus credit is not known.)

Sisterly Love

I've been meaning to write about this story, but have been forgetting, amidst all of the 'gettin ready for school' stuff we've been doing.

A few weeks ago at the YMCA, I was picking up the girls after my workout and after looking for them for about 1 minute, I began to worry. Usually, KM spots me first and makes a mad dash to me, but not this time. Neither one of the girls were to be found.

--Heart-pounding--

I round the corner and I hear giggling from the girls' bathroom. I peek under the stall and see Elisan's shoes and KM's shoes dangling.

--Heart-rate slowing down now--

I walk up to the stall and tell Elisan to open the door. There is KM on the potty, pooping. If you know me at all, you know I am an anal kind of gal when it comes to matters of the potty and pooping. See, the gist of it is, that I am still wiping KM's botty after she poops. I can't stand the idea of her wiping herself. Nope. Not yet, anyway. I'm a little weird like that.

So, anyway, back to the story... KM is pooping and Elisan is standing there with her. I ask Elisan, "Elle, whatcha doing?"

She says, "Kyla's pooping!" in that "like duh!" voice.

I say, "She can poop by herself, ya know."

She says, "But, she can't wipe her self."

I say, "So, what? Were you going to wipe her booty for her?"

She says, "Yes... but, I didn't want to!"

That, my friends, is sisterly love.

So, next time you are questioning the love you have for your sister, (or brother for that matter...) stop and ask yourself... Would you wipe their booty for them?

Dinner blessing as told by Kyla Mae

Kyla Mae insists on giving the dinner blessing every night. Sometimes its the same, sometimes she spices things up. Here's tonight's rendition:

"Dear Jesus. Thank you for Mommy and Daddy and Elisan and Kyla Mae. Thank you for all the blessings. Thank you for the bad things we do. And... Jesus is coming to my birthday party. Amen."

One of my favorite foods is Boudain. If you aren't from around these parts, then you probably don't know what it is, so click here and get educated...

Today, as I was preparing lunch I pulled out the boudain from the 'fridge and KM starting jumping up and down, saying, "Boo-dee, boo-dee, boo-dee!"

After a moment, I finally realized that in her own cute three year old way, she was sayin' boudain.

Fast forward 10 minutes later and I'm on the phone with my mom while we're having lunch. It's KM's turn to talk and my mom asked her what she was eating. Imagine her surprise when KM said, "Boo-dee."

So, my question is... was that a boo-dee call?

(Okay, that was just bad and wrong!)

As I was sorting the laundry to wash, Elisan walked in the laundry room and offered to help.

I said, "Take all of the white clothes and put them in this empty basket."

She said as she was picking up her first piece, "Ew... but they're dirrrrty!"


Later,

I'm still stuck in the 50's.

Photo courtesy of Project Laundry List.

"CLICK"

The other night, after dinner, we sent Kyla Mae into the bathroom to wash her hands. She's known to spend an inordinate amount of time in the bathroom -- playing with the light switch, using too much foam soap or just running the water on full blast for, oh.... 2 minutes or so. This particular night was no different.

A minute later, Elisan doubles over and decides that she needs to go potty - and fast!

Kyla heard Elisan proclaim her bathroom announcement and as soon as Elisan is high-tailing it to the bathroom, we hear "click".

Kyla locked the bathroom door on Elisan. Meanwhile, Elisan is beating on the door pleading with Kyla to let her in, saying that she can't hold it any longer (she's like me... I wait and hold it until the last minute too!). But the door never unlocked. It was not until Randy and I both told her to unlock the door did she let her in.

A few moments later, Kyla comes bouncing out of the bathroom. Barely able to contain our laughter, I ask her if she locked sissy out of the bathroom. She said she did. I asked her if she was being mean to sissy and she said yeah. Randy in his best "stern voice, but I can't stop laughing because it's so darn funny" face, tells Kyla that what she did was naughty. Totally unfazed... she bounced into the next room to play.

Funny on many levels, especially if you know KM, but the fact that she thought fast enough to lock the door as soon as Elisan needed the bathroom was priceless. She's three, but she has the mind of a... well,... five year old?

Public Behaviour

So, today I'm in the pick-up line at Elisan's school. I see E's class approaching the pick-up awning, when I notice that Elisan is walking kind of funny.

I crane my neck to see what's wrong with my girl, and to my horror she has one hand (or rather arm) down the front of her pants. She's...ehem...taking care of some personal business down there to which she is totally clueless to anyone around her or the public hygiene rules that I've ever-so-gently tried to convey to her from about the time she could understand the spoken word.

And there she was... oblivious.

I began looking around at the other moms standing around to see if they were watching her and thankfully, it seemed they were oblivioius too.

After she removed her hand, she used her other hand and began yanking her undies out of her booty, because ya know... undies tend to get bunched up when your takin' care of business.

Ah... to be five again.

I'll be sure to delete this post when she discovers my blog.